Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Demon Cat Judges Me

When I caption a cat photo I usually am just refining the first thing that pops into my mind. Some rise fully formed and others need to be rewritten to capture a part - a snap-shot of a conversation set in the world the photograph occupies. I am ashamed at how ridiculously easy they are to write for me. I would like to think I hit the mark about 80% of the time.

But this time I feel like I crossed some kinda line with a photo caption that is a bit grim. Well not fun grim like I enjoy but real grim because the end of the story in this picture does not turn out good for the kitties. I would like to think they got saved from burning in the fire and then went to work as fire house cats.

Do I seem erratic? It's all those stupid movies I have watched lately like ZARDOZ which I refused to finish because it's a stupid futuristic movie about enlightened humans who don't want to have sex with the savage and stupidly dressed beast men around them (Sean Connery) who in turn have been given guns and ammo from a talking space ship so they can kill people but not breed because the gun is good...haven't babies isn't. It's all very strange and stupid.

These posters tells you everything you need to know about this movie. Someone tell me why this is remotely something called a movie? It was bad 'BRAVE NEW WORLD' mixed with impractical and stupid fashion choices. Those outfits would look bad on anyone except those with 0% body fat. If I am THAT distracted then you need to have been a little more zippy with your storytelling Mr John Borman.

I remember your EXCALIBUR to be equally weird and inaccessible. The voices especially were bad in Arthur and Merlin. Does Patrick Stewart on the right side of the battle against other castles make up for those excesses? Eh.

Zardoz gets a DID NOT FINISH from me for boring me so much that I didn't even use the vast resource of the Internet to research it's special message. It's just looked like more balloon juice and balloon juice is something only I may generate around here.

And add to that BEYOND STUPID.

Here are some happier captions. I hope some people have some time to talk with me sometime 'bout stuff.

I really need to stop eating all this beautiful peaches and creme corn on the cob. I pretty much feel like Galactus must feel after he has eaten a fibre rich planet or two and then waited about 24 hours. Well now I am under the control of the corn lobby. I abandoned their high fructose corn syrup and they came at me through my clean colon. "What the man gives with one hand he takes back with two."

Upcoming at the 'Cave of Cool Drive-In'

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