Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I Need Some Advice

I have been contemplating giving into my mother's suggestion to trim my mighty beard. But I don't want to do it myself because I always mess up the shaping of the remaining hair so I will be starting my next mighty growth under a disadvantage.

I would love to find a old timey barber in my town that does a close shave with a hot towel, hot foam and a sharp straight razor but a joy like that is a thing of the past I assume. There is a salon at the mall that does good beard trimming so that will probably where I end up.

Seems to be a hassle because I know that I cannot stick to a daily shaving schedule. I have no one pretty to shave for and in fact, I often get handed loose change on the street by people who think I am homeless. That is pure profit for me.

If someone gives me the 'stink eye' for taking too many FREE sample at 'Costo', the wild beard always helped me play the 'crazy, loud, indignant, entitled customer to it's full effect. (I have an issue with limits put on FREE samples by angry people who hate their lives and think THEY are paying for the food they are cooking up for us shoppers.)

So what do you think? Shave or not? I may let the majority win this one or I might just go with what the first girl from the Ukraine, who is willing to become my mail order bride, thinks.

So vote now and vote often (especially Ekatarina from Kiev) She was my first Russian bride but someone messed up the postage and address on the crate and she was shipped to Madagascar instead of Canada. And with an incorrect tracking number it quickly became impossible for me to find her. I can't even watch that cartoon movie, 'Madagascar' because I am afraid I will see her in the background crowd shots and it will break my heart again. She was the best fake imaginary foreign girlfriend/bride that I ever had.

NEXT we will talk about coloring because I am sick or my beard not being one uniform color. Any 'Just For Men' shade you like? Apparently you just comb it in. I might leave some of the grey for character. Plus it drives the ladies at the nursing home wild.

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